ta-dah!

to satisfy all the calls and msn messages i've been getting re the haircut; THIS IS the look i settled for. today it's starting to curl but when i first had it cut, my stylist had it blown straight jennifer aniston style. liked it a lot but she gave me the stinky eye - you know ... that side glance that screams "don't you freaking even think of rebonding your hair". i love my stylist, she knows what's good for me :)

makeover

i've been toying with the idea of changing my look. i loaded a pic and started fussing with the styles. what do you think. i'm digging the chinadoll, monroe and pink look.

the tinkerbelle - don't make me grab my magic dust!


she bangs, she bangs!

can you feel my shagalicious mojo bay-bee!

the monroe ... happy birrrth-day to youuuuuuuu ....

the chinadoll

geek in the pink

roll in the hay OR is this what the cat dragged in ... MEOW!

orrrrrr .... i could just leave it as is



sigh ... decisions decisions

it was a planning malfunction, dammit!

i knew janet jackson's tour was going to hit singapore. i sorta knew when and left it as that. i would have given ms jackson a beat coz she's a freaking mind-blowing entertainer and i wanted to be entertained. i wanted to be taken on an escapade.

instead, i chose to wait a while. alright, i procrastinated and then found it too late to pull together a posse. worse, the seat choice was seriously nasty by the time i got my act together. i supremely annoyed myself. i would have enjoyed dressing up for the concert. and i would have totally rocked the lyrics. the whole prepping for a concert, it's a pleasure principle; a girly thing.

it was a planning malfunction. i thought i was in control. ugghh, it doesn't really matter now.

sidenote : i'm totally digging her new hair. i'm planning a make-over soon and i'm looking at some serious lock-chopping.

2 steps to the left of the side note : i really wanted to work in ALL FOR YOU in this post, but couldn't find an angle. it's one of my faves. Sing it!

"all my girls at the party, look at that body, shakin that thing, like you never did see, got a nice package all right. hit it: 4, 3, 2, 1

marv - my silver surfing man of steel

you've been wondering why i've not been blogging? hubs took the lappy to work and then we had none. i had gotten so dependent on his apple laptop that when he took it away, i had major withdrawals. reminded me of how, when we were dating, he'd hold out so that i'd come back for (and want) more. 10 years on and i'm still falling for his shenanigans. dammit.

the teasing stops here. i've since decided to treat myself to a new machine. i've been thinking abt buying a mac for about 2.5 years now, remember. but i hung on to pc and refused to convert. then the iphone was thrusted at me and slowly, he seduced me with his many apple gadgets. so at the recent sale, i bought my very own macbook pro.

meet marv. he's my new bff.
*see my fat fingers that don't help w the tiny keyboard on the iphone* be afraid ... be very afraid.

why marv? well he's silver and i mostly surf with him.
silver surfer = marvel = marv

hubs thinks "marv" sounds gay . well too bad, i like it. wait till he hears that i'm looking to buy marv a purple shell!! rainbow connection people. yo!

twisted priorities

had the weirdest dream last night. hubs and i agreed that we both would find partners to romp with. one day he comes with a chick - big hair, short tight skirt, legs to her armpits .. you get the drift.

anyways, i was coming out of starbucks and had just lit my last cigarette, when we bumped into each other. (she was with him) we said hi then i passed her my coffee and smoke and said that i needed to use the restroom.

when i came back out, she said she finished my stick and drank my coffee. i hit the roof! who did this *itch think she is for drinking my starbucks and smoking my marlboro! it's one thing to bang my man but it's another to take my smokes and joe. she crossed the line. THE LINE!!!

i woke up angry. i mean i was seriously pissed off. then i shared the dream w hubs and he was like "good to know your priorities. does that mean i can go find a woman."

sure hon, in YOUR dreams.

the dancing nomadic tribe

yesterday was AG's bday and we had family over - some of our most fave people in the world. boomy and sam, ki and we also had a smidgen of DG. we did the usual bday thing then the "adults" - yeah that's us - sat around the dinning table for some conversation. and let me tell you, it felt so good! not that we were talking abt adult stuff et al. hah!

well my fave bit, which turned out to be the running joke of the night, was the nomadic dancing tribe. we were doing the multi-racist thing when ki said (and i'm para-phrasing) "watsup with the desert scenes where right out of no where 40 dancers can jump in with the pelvic thrust and the boob shimmy." then instinctively, we both started to chest air pump and shimmy at the same time! hahaha .... well, you just had to be there.

anyway, these dress alike synchronised dancers that pop out of no-where were labeled THE dancing nomadic tribe. we continued with spin-off tales of their origins, what they could possibly be doing to earn extra cash, what an impt role the fat dancer plays, how on down days they could possibly ambush innocent unbeknowns who sits at home reading a book ... and so much more. boy was it fun! full of nonsensical fun. i almost didn't want it to end but it was a school night :(

jai ho everybody!

post note : just referenced hubs on some details abt the convee last night and he was like " why? starting a wiki page ah?" don't tempt me boyyyyyyy!

packing order

and so the million dollar question is .... what do i pack for my vaycay?

dee is packing 2 sets of underlings. a sarong. a t-shirt. a dress. a bikini. all inside her back pack.

i'm like WHAT! IS THAT ALL!!! WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SLEEP IN???!!!

i want to bring double of everything she's packing (except the underlings coz it's bali and the likelihood of even using the said underlings is slim.) and i've not even started on my toiletries bag which ALONE weighs a ton!

we're going in jeans and a tee and fitflops. and now i'm considering bringing shoes coz we have a nice dinner planned too. maybe my crocs which are really light. but what if i'm cold? i should take my hoodie. and my toes? should i bring socks? do i need a hat? i have some cute hats :) and a bag within the bag. and shorts? won't i need shorts? i don't have a sarong. maybe i should bring shorts. OMG!!!

you know the last time i packed a bag was for the hospital when baby was born.

to go with the ebb and flow

bali is in 4 days and i can't decide if i'm excited or not. right off the bat, i have to say that the recent tsunami has gotten my attention. paranoia is in my head and i hope it does not take over. i've found this website but i hesitate to register. i wonder if it works and whether it will just feed my horror rather than allay my anxiety.

how am i going to have a restful night's sleep knowing that the sea is right out my window/ balcony? and sleep is big on my agenda. sigh. i hope i'm not going to get all tight arsed and learn to relax. i'm going to buy alcohol on my way in, hopefully it will help. aside ... i hope mother nature shows us some love ... from one mother to another, mother nature ma'am .... you know i deserve this holiday.

birthday wishes

and so it's November and the slew of bday's have started. lazy me is going to do the mass bday wishes thing because ... well ... i'm lazy ... and i don't usually do the bday thing ... so this is big ... that i'm actually doing this.

4 nov - bling - i haven't seen or spoken to bling in abt 5 years. but i still have her close in mind. anyways, i recently wanted to call another B person when i fat-fingered my contact list and called her instead. i quickly hung up coz i'm really bad at the whole keeping in touch thing. abt 1 hour later, she calls back. thankfully it's already nov so i did the happy bday thing and we managed to catch up a bit. i told her the truth abt fat-fingering and she still loves me :) and THAT's the scorp difference people!

6 nov - Poochiespider and Obsidian - what can i say ... you hotties keep bringing sexy back!

8 nov - DG!! - must share this ... the family made effort to call DG last night and put the call on speaker. we heard the "hello" and we all started singing the bday song. and in 2 languages. even baby was shouting in the back; but she always shouts anyways ... when we were done, the person said, "sorry wrong number" and hung up! i sent DG a text this morning and and wished her belated love instead.

9 nov - cheryl-ann superstar because that's who you areeeeeeee!

10 nov - angel girl (i'm planning math tuition for her on this day ... just to freak her out .... muah ah ah)

13 nov - me!!! but i'll be in bali that day (for 3 days) so pls don't get all emo if you leave FB and SMS messages and i'm late in replying. i will reply ... once the massages wear off and i get movement in my fingers again :)

and i think it ends here. phew.

but if you want to read some more, here are my past bday blogs which still brings on a smile whenever i re-read it. enjoy! not sure why that last one was included under the bday search but i'm not gonna question the powers behind blogspot.

blue moon

the moon, the melancholic moon, it's manipulating me. she's parked herself in scorpio and i feel myself crashing into reflection.

is this the life i was supposed to have? is there more i want? is this how i want to be loved? do i deserve better? can i do more? am i doing what i want? can i speak my mind? am i a good person? do i want to be a good person? or do i just want to appear like a good person? is this my life or your life lived through my being?

is my life the reflection of my thoughts?

bali high

this bday is all about decadence. i am going to bali with dee and our sole agenda is to space out and spa ourselves stupid.

our basic itinerary is : wake up, stuff face at breakfast, head for the beach to stone out, lunch, nap by the pool while we toast ourselves in the sun, dinner. we'll sneak in the massages somewhere/ somehow.

3 things i'm excited about
1) smothering myself with Hawaiian Tropics (... i LUURRRVVVEEE that coconut scent) and hanging out in my bikini all day.

2) 3 mornings of pigging out on the American Breakfast buffet at the hotel. can you say nuah eggs with sausage, bacon and baked beans :) hell, i'll even have my eggs in a bulls eye with the soft middle on day two and in a cheese omelette on day 3!!!

3) the possibility of actually reading a book! and i've got one too. I'm bringing along the girl with the dragon tattoo.

it's the first time we are travelling together and i just know we're going to have so much fun. dee and i are going to see who out-anals who. hahaha. place your bets now. the psycho-controlling mother of 4 or the woman who successfully took charge of a bunch of giddy after-office-hour gen-Xers (and one Y-er) at trivia night. it's a close fight people.

run, forest run ... and don't look back!

a few people around me are dieting in a frantic race to lose weight before xmas. more so to be their hawtest for the festive season and i can totally relate. just last year (and pre-baby in 2008) i was running this race with a vengeance. i ran this race twice - both times with determination to succeed and succeed i did.

many have asked what my motivation was to stay focused. well, i was in denial until i saw this photo of me at a party. arms the size of my now calves. no collar bones. double chin. the works! in my full glory, i weighed in at 82kg.
the funny thing is i remember this day so clearly. i specifically wore this tube top coz i thought i looked good in it. i actually thot the look was slimming. boy was i wrong.

well reality hit me like a ton of bricks. i knew i had to do something and i got to it. now i look like this.i still have my fat days but i now know what to do when that comes round. i think with weight management, there is only DO ... there is no try. you're either in it or not. so to all my GFs running the race, trust me, you guys are gonna look so HAWT, i may just need to slap on the sun block when i hang out with you!

still not gletting it

i've given it a shot and i still don't get the hype. glee.

my friends love it but i still have not found enough purpose in life to offer it the 1hour when i could be doing something else ... i dunno ... say ... cutting my toe nails?

it's like high-school-musical-groundhog-day and if you know my sentiment for HSM, or ANY musicals et al, you'd understand my twitch i have with the show. i'm going to stop believing now.

the only saving grace is this guy. mr mohawk. yummos right. aside, i think it's just meh.

#2 ... why i need an iphone

helps w the toilet time. i know .. it's lame. but really, this girl needs to surf.

the pretenders ... aren't we all

feeling alone again. i'm trying so hard to keep things together single handedly. but every time i think i'm making some head-way, a seam gives. i'm running out of ideas on how to fix things. how to keep it whole without wasting away. i pretend that it's all good. that i've got a handle on things. but really ... i'm tired. not strong enough. i think i just need a good cry and maybe a little jesus.

the kettle boils, bubbles and sings, musically

i've been craving for a bag of honey dijon kettle chips. told dg abt it last night. she wanted to offer me her bag of doritos ... *rolls eyes*. we all know it's not the same! but she insisted and i caved and relented.

then she left the said bag of chips in her car and was too lazy to go back and get it. sigh. so the crave lives on.

i don't know why i did this but while thinking abt kettle chips, i went on to think about kettle quotes - that i knew of at least. of course there are more

there's the ever favourite "the pot calling the kettle black" - which actually is quite funny if you get a 3rd person visual of a discussion between a pot-head and an african american name-calling.

and the popular "polly put the kettle on, and we'll all have tea". poor polly. i say, next time, send the lazy bunch off to starbucks for their fix. or only make tea if someone offers to bake something :)

and then i started thinking of chips the tv series. i couldn't help this pic :)
check our eric estrada! and those aviator shades. and ... and the tight pants. for the life of me, i can't remember the name of that other guy. and i'm too lazy to google it!

ok, this is getting weird.

caught in a t(ri)angle

i was teaching MB his spelling words in my bedroom, when mom walked in.

mom : whose sandwich is that in the fridge, can i eat it for dinner?

me : it's mine ....

mom : oh, never mind then ... i'll just have some biscuits ...

me : no mom, go ahead and eat it

mom : no no, you eat it

me : no, you have it.

mom : no, no ... nevermind *but her eyes were lying*

me : *annoyed* mom! will you eat it already! stop playing this game. if you want the sandwich, go eat it.

mom : ok *smile*

end of scene one

let me tell you a little something about this sandwich. it's a smoked salmon sandwich from swiss bake. the bread is kraftkorn which is a dark malt bread consisting of cereals and oil seeds , malt, wheat, rye, oat, soya, sunflower seeds and flaxseed. if you buy it off their shelf, it sells as a loaf. but for this sandwich, it's baked round, and it's cut in a generous wedge - almost the size of a large pizza slice. the filling is smoked salmon, cream cheese, lettuce and capers on a meculin salad - again, all generous portions. priced decently at $8.50 a pop.

*i'll pause right here for you guys to soak it in and get a visual*

this IS my favourite sandwich and it's extremely hard to come by because it sells out very VERY fast. this afternoon, when i went to swiss bake to order MB's bday cake, i saw the beautiful sandwich from the corner of my eye. i knew it was mine! IT HAD TO BE MINE!!

scene two

mom : let's share ... i'll cut it into half

me : ok mom, if it will make you happy

moments later i walk up to the sandwich (remember, i told you it's cut in a wedge). mom's idea of half was not down the middle from the tip to the crust (creating 2 triangles). nooooo, she cut it right across, creating an isosceles triangle on one end and a trapezium of sorts on the other. i took one look at what had become of my sandwich and told mom that she could have it all.

mom, who is used to my idiosyncrasies, decided to agree with me without batting an eye.

end

1) for me, it's either ALL or nothing. yeah, sure i'll share ... but it's not my preference ... i know ... i'm a selfish punk

2) i'll never get over the feeling of having to sacrifice. i swear, i was not made for this emotion. i know for most, there is a sense of satisfaction, gratification even, knowing that you've given up something you like to someone who needs it more. but i rarely ever get this effect following a sacrifice. close to never. instead, i get a sick feeling in my stomach. i ruffle my feathers for not holding fort.

3) i like eating my food, especially my sweets and savories, in wedges. i must have a thing for triangles. i know that when i eat steak, i like cutting it into tiny triangular bits. of course, i like seeing my cakes, pies and quiches sliced this way too. food cut in squares/ rectangles are so blah. food cut in wedges take you on a journey - a choose your own adventure gastronomical trip even. follow me ....

you can start with the tip where everything is at it's richest. that's where you get most of the filling. the end is where the crust is thickest. also the most gritty texture. sometimes it's bland, but still nice as a last taste. i like to alternate tip and end sometimes, to balance the flavours. unless it's cake with an icing or is coated with chocolate rice or shavings etc. so then the logic reverses and the end is now the richest. sometimes i savour the tip for last, other times the crust. the combinations vary on the mood and what is served.

so when i saw my beautiful triangle sandwich butchered, i felt robbed of my journey and just had to walk away.

POST NOTE : this blog is also tri-part-tied hahahaha. 3 topics. i amuse myself. :)

mother of a day

i pulled a nerve in my back, trying to open a jar of sun dried tomatoes, last night. the sharp pain traveled from the back of my neck down to my hip. now it hurts like hell and it's mighty uncomfortable. quasimodo in the house!

to add to that, i danced w the devil and ate salted egg crabs for dinner last night. we all know, i'm allergic to crustaceans. i took my anti-histamine before indulging but i knew that it wouldn't be enough to avoid the consequences. yet, tho i was armed w the knowledge and familiar with the repercussions, i ate the crab. this morning, i am an itching mess. i also have a swollen tongue and a tight throat.

to add salt to a wound, i seem to have caught the viral gastroenteritis (GE) bug from AG who got it from Bu. or maybe not coz intestinal irritation is also an allergic reaction.

so to sum it up, i feel like shite. i had to call my mom in to help me w the kids today instead of celebrating all that she has done for me. some mother's day this is turning out to be.

mother's day, schmother's day. really, we should appreciate mothers everyday. do we really need a day to prompt us to be nice to our moms, instead of taking them for granted, knowing that they will understand? we play them as much as they play us. but i think we started playing them first. that incessant crying as a baby coz we wanted to be carried, knowing that it tugged at their heart strings. we play moms like a fiddle. and moms, being moms, know this and they still bend backwards for us.

i called my grandmother to wish her "happy mother's day" and to tell her that i would not be able to visit her today. very calmly, she said,"that's ok, mothers should always expect disappointment. don't worry, i know you love me and we both love each other." all i could offer back was a meek promise to visit when i feel better. but i could tell in her voice that she knew not to hold her breath.

i was dumbfounded by the sheer truth of that statement and the impact (in all it's simplicity) it had on me. i know for sure, that as a mom, i'm disappointed a lot. by the kids, the hubs and situations that i have to deal with. like today for eg, hubs has missed mother's day 3 times in a row because of work. which means, i don't get my due appreciation today. and yet, i deal with it and make the most of it. i know he loves me and if given the opportunity, he would not miss it.

so ... appreciate your mother always. believe me, i know it's tough, but they deserve it. if nothing else, for carrying you uncomfortably for 9 months and having to push you out in pain but with so much love.

dam it!

how can one person retain so much water.
i've gone past camel, for crying out loud!
just call me queen of the dam-ed.
where's my chocolate!

Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love ... 'Tis but thy name that is my enemy - chocolate sweet chocolate

i'm just off my high of giving a 25 slide presentation to senior management. i spent the whole of yesterday data crunching then case-finding to support the said data.

went well i think. i say this coz i had some bad news to tell and they did look miserable after i was done. they also had nothing to say at the Q&A. which could mean one of 2 things : i bored them out of their socks or my message was loud and clear. i think it's the latter coz the coffee served was hot and strong. plus i was really working the eye-contact thing.

now, i'm sitting at my desk. i'm eating an apple but i'm wishing that it is a bar of chocolate. dark chocolate with nuts. dark bitter-sweet chocolate with almonds - roasted almonds to be specific. so why don't i just eat the chocolate (coz i have one in my overhead cupboard)? coz i got on the freaking scales this morning and i'm up a kg! dammit. still within range tho but still ... PMS starts next week, so what gives!

alas, my only love sprung from my only hate! Too early seen unknown, and known too late! Prodigious birth of love it is to me, That I must love a loathèd enemy.

mind over matter ... mind over matter ...

POSTNOTE : i caved at about 4-some. i popped 2 squares in my mouth. somehow, pre-meditated chocolate is not as good at spontaneous chocolate. the guilt got in the way. sigh.