signs of pain

so here's my theory about pain. physical pain is for the moment; it's the emotional pain that will kill you.i've always felt that physical pain is mind over matter but emotional pain catches you off guard and sometimes at your most vulnerable.

take exhibit A (me), i've endured having my entire left thigh, from just above the knee to 3 inches from my hip, skinned when i accidentally walked into a 5' drain and scraped my leg against the granite wall. i've endured the pain of having 3 stitches on my left thumb, just behind the nail where all the nerve endings are, without LA. oh i also had to endure pain when the the doctor injected the LA 3 times into the muscle at the base of my thumb, without much success, which is why he had to go ahead w the stitching coz i was bleeding my arm dry.

i've also ensured surgically removing all my wisdom teeth at one go. i remember looking like a chipmunk coz my mouth was so swollen and having steak later that evening. then there are the 4 kids that i've given birth to naturally and the 4 times engorgement madness with each child. not to mention the tattoos.

i look back at these events in jest. yes, my threshold for pain is high. sucker you say ... heh. i do remember hurting like hell when it happened but i forget, how bad it hurt.

... which is exactly my point. with all these experiences, if you ask me now to rate the pain, i can honestly say, i cannot remember. but if you ask me to recall how i felt when my first crush dumped me in my pubescent years, the pain - although insignificant now, comes back, sometimes 10 fold - depending on what i remember, and it festers. and then i have to will myself out of the self induced rut.

ps : interestingly, i find that physical pain numbs out mental/ emotional pain. which is why, i guess, people become self destructive. but that's another train of thought altogether.